clutter

I had made (or attempted to make) an appointment to have the Beetle detailed before donating it. I hadn’t been successful in getting anyone on the phone to confirm the appointment, but I’m in a hurry to get this done, so I went out to my car this morning to drive it to the detailer, near my office. 

The key fob didn’t unlock the door. Uh-oh. 

I opened the door with the key, put the key in the ignition, and… nothing. Not even a click click click. Crap.

Called Triple A, decided to make the best of it and have some breakfast. Triple A showed up within half an hour, gave the Beetle a jump, and I was on my way. Great!

But as I was driving down Rhode Island Avenue, right before 5th St. NE and the McDonald’s, I see a little gray kitten skittering away from a white van, across a lane of traffic. I did not actually see it happen, but I’m thinking the only reason a kitten ends up in the middle of a major thoroughfare during rush hour is because someone put it there. Some asshole dumped a kitten in heavy traffic. 

So of course I pulled over as soon as I could to see if I could help it. But I had to drive up a rather long driveway and park in the parking lot before running back down to where I had seen the kitten. I looked for it a bit, couldn’t find it, didn’t see it, you know, in the street, and decided it had probably found a kitten-sized hidey-hole that it was not inclined to leave anytime soon, thankyouverymuch. So I went back to my car.

Remember how I said I had parked my car? After having to have it jumped from a completely dead battery?

Yeah. The car didn’t start.

But there was an MPD officer parked a short distance away, so I asked her if she had any jumper cables. She did not. I thanked her anyway, and out of sheer exasperation with the second time I was in the same situation in the space of an hour, I explained that I had stopped with my dead battery because there was a kitten! That had been dumped! In the middle of Rhode Island Ave.!

The officer’s eyes widened. “DUMPED A KITTEN? Did you see where the kitten went? What color was it?” 

“It was a gray kitten. I saw it make it across the street down at the end of the driveway, but it had disappeared by the time I got back down there.”

She offered to radio around to see if any other officers in the area had jumper cables. I said I’d continue looking for the kitten in the meantime.

So she did, and I did. I was walking around this elevated median, and people were driving by, looking at me. One lady rolled down her window to ask, “Ma’am? Are you…okay?”

Still couldn’t find the little thing, which is probably still terrified and hiding in the shrubbery, and I am NOT PLEASED ABOUT IT.

So I went back to my car. The MPD officer indicated that another officer was on the way with jumper cables. And indeed, in a few minutes a Housing Authority officer rolled up to jump the car. Hooray! On my way again, but trying not to contemplate a frightened kitten that I have not been able to find.

I still hadn’t gotten a return call from the auto detailer. So finally I decided to call their other location. The very enthusiastic gentleman who answers the phone is embarrassed to inform me that the DC location’s computers have been down, but he has my info, and that the person who is working there today will be arriving shortly, and I can leave my car with a note and she will attend to it when she arrives. 

Which is what I did, because the place is on the bottom level of a parking garage.

I finally arrived at the office at 10:30, and emailed my boss to let him know I had finally arrived and what had happened in between. 

He responded: “Good lord! Don’t leave the building today or who knows what will happen.”

So if you hear about a meteor crashing into the Mall across from the Lincoln Memorial, you will know what happened.