clutter

Basically, this is a side dish of gaslighting to go with your main course of verbal abuse. Denying that people’s experiences are real, or even possible, sets you up as the authority on their reality — what happens to them, how they feel about it. It’s a timeworn tradition for keeping abused parties doubting themselves, blaming themselves, and coming back, over and over. You’re supposed to think “god, maybe I am inventing a problem, making a big deal out of nothing. Maybe there’s nothing wrong with this. Maybe this is just the way things are.